


you are the sun and i am just the planets, spinning around you

by rainbow_porcupine_ninja



Category: The Song of Achilles - Madeline Miller
Genre: Drabble, Drabble? more like shitty teenage poetry, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Reincarnation, heavy use of metaphors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-31
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:47:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26212159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbow_porcupine_ninja/pseuds/rainbow_porcupine_ninja
Summary: it’s been so long, but your freckles are the same. the upturn of your smile, the harsh planes of your stomach. they’re all mine, as you reminded me once.
Relationships: Achilles/Patroclus (Song of Achilles)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 49





	you are the sun and i am just the planets, spinning around you

you sit patiently, the stars in your eyes hanging steadily like always. you don’t turn, just let me come to you; i collapse by your side and can’t breathe, because we’re finally together—

it’s been so long, but your freckles are the same. the upturn of your smile, the harsh planes of your stomach. _they’re all yours_ , you reminded me once.

death is just a constellation of dreams, but we circle around each other each time like gods, like planets. never far, our golden hearts beating a constant, single rhythm.

sometimes your hair is blue, and you wrap yourself around me as we sleep some more, then you leave in the morning without a trace.

i fade a little after that, but your smile is so bright and familiar that i don’t mind.

sometimes your body is littered with tattoos. i like them— you tell me that you’ve picked them out yourself, so i suppose that makes them a part of you. i trace them one night, as we lie in our apartment together. we get married in the autumn, where the leaves remind us of home.

next, we’re just boys. we touch each other, palm to palm, not really understanding what we are doing, and my mother slaps us and speaks with harsh, jilting language. we run away together on the back of an unsuspecting truck; the joined clasp of our hands filling me with confusing adrenaline.

you die in the next life, and i am forced to watch once again as your breath fades,the light gone from your eyes. i don’t think i can take one more life of this madness. 

as soon as we find each other again, I cry into your skin, and can’t leave your side for months.

i love you, and you love me, yet that sometimes that isn’t enough. we pull each other tightly, ripping and clawing, because we can’t bear to be separated— i want to pull you under my skin and keep our souls close forever.

_please_ , i beg as i’m separated from you once again. _please, i’m so tired of loving and losing him._ hades laughs at my face, his wife impassive by his side.

i turn to her. she of all people, must understand. she turns away, yet i am left hopeful.

you smile at me, bittersweet once again. _a few more rounds of the sun, my love_ , you murmur to me as we meet, this time through friends. we hold each other close, basking in sunlight and moonlight, sunlight and moonlight.

i will never grow sick of you, nor you of me. your hair is curlier this time round, and i love running my fingers through it. it reminds me of our nights together all the way back when. we’ve shared so many nights together, and i’m glad they gave me hair so similar to our firsts. 

  
  


_is it time_? you whine at me eventually when you return from work. i kiss your stomach after a while. our hairs’ gone grey.

eventually it is, i think. i’m so scared, all these lives so full of each other that at the last second it might be snatched away, i can barely begin to imagine it.

  
  
  


persephone is gentle with me as i tear at her perfect dress. _please, oh fuck_ , i scream, as you are nowhere to be seen. i can’t bear not having your presence down here, and i’ll tear at their throats if they won’t let me see you once again.

_i can’t bear it without him_ , i scream and plead. 

_be patient_ , hades chides. _he is coming_. 

i wait in fields of poppies. not for long—

i hear your footsteps. i would recognise them anywhere, and follow them to the ends of the earth if i could. 

we hold onto each other, our tears mingling on our immortal cheeks.

_patroclus_ , i breathe onto your skin. 

_are you ready_? he responds, and we press our souls together. 

i can see you, and feel you, and hear you: you’re here, all around. we clutch at each other, and here and here and here:

_patroclus_. 

  
  


_achilles_.

  
  


and i think we might be okay, now. at last we are together, you and i, as we float up and up and up.

  
  


“He is half of my soul, as the poets say.” —Madeline Miller, The Song Of Achilles.

**Author's Note:**

> did i write this all in one sitting? yes. was i crying the entire time? also yes. did i read it afterwards and go “what the fuck does this angst mean?” ... mayhaps
> 
> but then again this is fanfiction. i can post whatever the hell i want. please don’t hate it, it might be bullshit but it’s MY bullshit :)
> 
> also the title comes from FOB. thanks, m8s


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